Just Call Me Bond

I left this week for what SHOULD HAVE been an easy one-day trip to Houston to make housing arrangements and register the kids for school. Ha! Here's what really happened. . . prepare yourselves for a 72-hour thrilling adventure of hurricanes, hostages, tornadoes, spies, secret correspondents, and unexpected twists and turns.
Oh, and by the way? Just call me Bond.

MONDAY
7:13 pm - I kiss the kids goodnight, grab my backpack(supplied with all my contact info and two good books to read on the airplane). I head for Salt Lake City.

8:04 pm - I have a lovely visit with my Grandma Joyce who gave me some gaudy earrings (I don't have pierced ears) and said she missed seeing the boys (obviously forgetting the last time they visited when they tore through her museum-house on a path of destruction)

9:58 pm - I park, camp, and gossip at Jenny and Mark's house for the night.

TUESDAY
5:40 am - I wake up to my internal alarm clock and the reminder that my flight leaves in 45 minutes. Off to the airport!

6:10 am - I arrive at the airport (thanks Jenny) only to discover that all the airports in Houston are closed because of a hurricane. I am informed they can re-book my flight in 2 days. Um, Nope. Or for a couple HUNDRED extra dollars they'll re-direct my flight to a neighboring city today. Otherwise the ticket is non-refundable. Okay. Fine. Send me to Dallas.
Hum-de-dum. . . I wait in the SLC airport. . .

9:35 am - I leave for Denver.

11:15 am - I arrive. ho-hum-de-do. . . I wait in the Denver airport.

1:50 pm - The plane leaves for Dallas. Just kidding. Technical difficulties - do-dee-doo. . . We wait on the runway for 2 hours.

3:40 pm - The plane leaves for Dallas.

5:34 pm - I arrive in Dallas. Rent a car. And wait in traffic. . .hum-dee-do.

6:40 pm - I meet Nate, my "correspondent", for a top-secret rendezvous at our house.

7:40 pm - I load the rental car with blankets, a pillow, umbrella, flashlights, and a box of Cheerios for the road.

7:55 pm - I drive off toward the Houston hurricane. Hum-de-hee. . . Okay now it's really getting stormy!

9:30 pm - The tropical storm slaps down on the freeway. Cars pull over to wait it out but NOT I! Ahhhhhhh. . . I creep along white-knuckled for two more hours into the storm and potential flooding. (I'm SO James Bond!)

WEDNESDAY
12:15 am - I arrive in Houston at last and pull into our driveway (thanks GPS). Oops. We don't own a dog. I could've sworn our agent said it was the house on the corner. Luckily for house numbers I find the right one and the keys hidden under a rock and a drenched notice from the electric company saying they could not connect our electricity because "no owner was present". Nope. I definitely was not.

12:34 am - I call my "correspondent" and inform him I survived the storm and report on the house status. I explore the house with a flashlight only to discover the back door UNLOCKED and swinging open. I try to sleep on the hardwood floor but I freak out over every unfamiliar sound and my imagination goes crazy thinking of that open door.

1:50 am - Fearing I might be in danger, I lock up the house, drive 2 blocks to the Elementary school, lock the doors, and hide in the car.

2:30 am - I accidentally set off the car alarm when I crack the door for fresh air. Sorry neighbors!

3:30 am - I take a walk around the school trying to find the front door (being careful of the car alarm this time).

4:15 am - I eat some Cheerios incognito and spy out my window ready to jump out as soon as I see the first car pull into the parking lot. After all I've been through I WILL BE the first parent in line for registration and WILL get that one and only opening for Pre-K. (I'm a die hard)

5:00 am - The arrival of a geophysicist from Jordan and a concert pianist from Syria - the next two parents in line for registration. Chat chat chat. . .hum-de-dum. . . chat chat. . .as 40 more parents trickle in.

8:00 am - Registration begins. Clayton and Isaac are in!!! Mission accomplished.

8:30 am - I call our Slavic property manager about the broken garage door. I fix the garage door myself with a coat hanger. Hmmmmm wish I had time to clean and buy a few essentials (like toilet paper)for the house. Wish I had time to meet the gas and electric companies like I had originally planned. Oh well. . . can't miss my flight out of Dallas. Hasta la vista Houston.

10:08 am - I hit the road.

12:20 pm - While driving, I witness some lady's Chihuahua jump out of her car window to it's death on the highway. I'm so sad - especially after seeing her shocked and devastated face. I wish I would've pulled over to help her. Darn! James Bond would have.

3:30 pm - Another secret meeting with my "correspondent" over ice cream back in Dallas. Then off to the airport.

4:15 pm - I return the rental car and take a shuttle to the terminal. do-dum-de-dum. . . wait wait wait. . .

6:04 pm - I board the plane right on time and we head onto the tarmac.

6:15 pm - Word arrives that the airport in Denver is closed because of a tornado. We are told to "sit tight" (no kidding) until the airport re-opens. I wait on the plane for five hours with the other "hostages".

11:30 pm - We are finally given clearance to fly into Denver with no guarantee of making any connecting flights.

THURSDAY
1:15 am - I arrive in Denver terminal E. Connection to SLC leaves in 11 minutes from terminal A. I race with superhuman speed from shuttle to shuttle and make the flight just before the doors close. Whew!

2:40 am - I arrive in Salt Lake City and take a taxi to Jenny and Mark's house.

3:20 am - I drive an hour back to Oakley red-eyed and amazed at the last 72 sleepless hours.

4:30 am - I am home at last where I sneak in as quietly as possible, change my clothes for the first time in three days, kiss all my children, and flop onto Isaac's air mattress (since he was in MY bed with grandma - I can ONLY guess why) for 3 hours of sleeping bliss. . .

*A special thanks to my WONDERFUL mother for taking such good care of the kids because everyone knows that a Bond adventure with children in tow would be mission IMPOSSIBLE.